Wednesday, July 11, 2007

Celebrity Portraits

Okay, so I have been joking for over a year now about getting two amazing portrait tattoos. One one thigh, I want David Duchovny as agent Mulder, with Gillian Anderson as agent Skully, and a bunch of UFO's and aliens and bigfoot and flukeman. On the other thigh, I want David Duchovny as the cross dressing agent on Twin Peaks, with Kyle MacLachlan as agent Cooper, with cherry pie and some logs and some coffee and maybe a dead crow or a percolator with a fish in it. The idea is hilarious to me and somehow I still find it hilarious over a year later (which is one test as to whether a tattoo is really worth getting or not). The thing is, I think David Duchovny would be a really hard guy to get a good portrait of (not to mention the fact that I probably would regret the whole thing later on down the line).

Anyway, here is some proof that celebrity portraits can be downright terrible.

Tuesday, July 10, 2007

Pinup Girls

Here are some really bad pinup girls, for your viewing pleasure.
Please note that they are all A) badly drawn and/or B) badly executed.

Look at the proportions on this one! She has no neck!

This is obviously a photo of a fresh tattoo, so I'm sure it evened out and looked better once it healed. However, the shading still looks splotchy, the 'halo' around her is bizarre, the mouth is wonky, and the outlines look scratchy.

The linework on this poor girl is terrible, and the drawing is too.

Wizards II

I actually like these wizards. It must be flash, or from some pretty well-known book, because I came across these today on two totally different tattoo shop sites.
If you have seen a wizard that looks like this or know where it might come from, let me know!


Here are three really bad suns, ranging from really not so bad to possibly the worst tattoo I have seen in my life. The first two are really an excuse to be able to post the third one.

This one is kind of scratchy and weird looking but the colors are good:

This one has a skull in it, and the colors aren't so great, but it's still not that bad:

But this, my friends, this is really really really bad. It's scarred, patchy, blobby, and faded.

Monday, July 9, 2007


I try to have little themes for each post that I do, but these tattoos are just in little leagues of their own.

This is clearly some kind of drunken home-done tattoo, but is seriously bad. Shitty, even.

Apparently this guy broke his collar bone a bunch of times, so he got it tattooed. I can think of a million things to put there that would be way cooler than this.

And finally, this one isn't so bad. I wasn't even really going to post it, I just had it saved in a little folder of mediocre cliche-bad tattoos. However, I was on the subway this weekend, and saw the tattoo in person, so it has to be posted. I don't know the person at all, it was complete luck (or this is flash and a lot of people have this terrible tattoo, in which case it's worse than I thought).


These tattoos are like getting someone's name tattooed on you, except worse. I don't get it. If you really love video games, get some awesome video game characters tattooed on you. If you really love cars, get an awesome vintage car tattoo. If you really love movies, get a tattoo from your favorite movie. If you really love a particular brand of computer... ok, I don't know what to say to you. Getting a tattoo of a Dell computer would be more lame than their logo.

I can't even comment on these individually. But seriously. DELL? BUICK? What are these people thinking?